I think Smithers picked me because of my motivaltional
skills. Everyone always says they have to work a lot harder when I'm around.
Homer,
is this the way you pictured married life?
Yup, pretty much. Except we drove around in a van solving mysteries.
Second class? What about Social Security,
bus discounts, Medic-Alert jewelry, Gold Bond powder, pants all the way up to your
armpits, and all those other senior perks? Oh, if you ask me, old folks have it pretty
sweet.
Okay,
okay, don't panic. To find Flanders, I just have to think like Flanders!
Homer's Brain: I'm a big four-eyed
lame-o and I wear the same stupid sweater everyday, and -
The
Springfield River!
Where ar
you going at this hour?
On a
treasure hunt.
Oh, can
I come?
Only
if you're ready to stare danger in the face, put your manhood to the ultimate test, and
take -
Pass.
You can be the first to try out the new guest bedroom
I built. Remember, if the building inspector comes by, it's not a room, it's a
windowbox.
Come here, Apu. If it'll make you feel any
better, I've learned that life is one crushing defeat after another until you just wish
Flanders was dead.
Look Marge, you don't know what it's like - I'm the
one out there every day putting his ass on the line. And I'm not tout of order!
You're out of order! The whole freaking system is out of order! You want the truth? You
want the truth? You can't handle the truth! 'Cause when you reach over and put your hand
into a pile of goo that used to be your best friend's face, you'll know what to do! Forget
it, Marge, it's Chinatown!
Oh my god! Space aliens! Don't eat me, I have a wife
and kids! Eat them!
Kent Brockman at the action news desk. A massive tanker
has run aground on the central coastline, spilling millions of gallons of oil on Baby Seal
Beach.
Oh no!
It'll be
okay, honey. There's lots more oil where that came from.